I know this is an odd topic but we have an issue here in our home and I’d love any advice we can get!
We have two kitties. Calleigh, our calico (surprise surprise) is almost four. We got her right after Zim was born and she’s a sweet girl. She’s very aloof though. She tolerates the boys but isn’t crazy about them. Partly because they agitate her so I get it. She's perfectly happy just sitting on her chair and chillin’. She doesn’t need attention and will occasionally come sit on my lap just for the company, not even really to be pet.
I got this great idea that I wanted to get another kitty that could be more of a pet for the boys. A kitty that would put up with them lovin’ on it. Ed’s mom has a kitty, Tigger, who is so tolerant of the boys and they love him. They come home and say, “Momma, I wish Calleigh was more like Tigger. I wish she would let us pet her and love her.” So I started a search for a kitty just for them. I checked a local shelter and was very specific as to what I wanted…a male cat that was older, loving, sweet, laid back and already neutered. A week later they had the perfect kitty for us…Merlin.
The boys were so excited to bring him home and after a few days of him hiding he soon started to get acclimated with them and his new home. Calleigh wasn’t crazy about him at all…who can blame her right? This has been her turf for almost four years and now there’s someone new…not cool. I completely expected them to not get along at first but figured after some time they’d grow to at least live in peace. I grew up having multiple cats and never had any issues…they’ve always gotten along and even played together.
Well, five months later and they still don’t get along. In fact I think it’s safe to say that she hates him. He won’t leave her alone either. I’m starting to feel really bad for her. It used to be that she would sit in the living room and basically she would have reign over the living room and upstairs while Mer would stay in the kitchen and downstairs. Occasionally he would try to come in but she’d growl. If he made it anywhere close to her there would be a cat fight and then Merlin would retreat once again. Now it’s worse, it’s like he’s not intimidated by her anymore and now Calleigh has taken to hiding in our bedroom upstairs. He actually cornered her in the living room the other day and she couldn’t get away. I had to break it up myself. Even this morning he managed to find her under our bed and there was a fight.
I feel awful and don’t know what to do. I hate that Calleigh is getting pushed into such a small part of her home. I know it’s my fault for doing this and I feel terrible. I also feel bad because Mer is such a sweet kitty and I think part of him bothering her is just because he’s curious and wants to be buddies. Of course a fight breaks out because she wants nothing to do with that. The boys love Merlin. He is so good with them and is exactly what I’d hoped for them….gentle, patient, loving. He was in the shelter for so long and I don’t want him to go back.
So, what would you do? I’m at a loss. The vet suggested these plug-in things that release a calming hormone but they are crazy expensive so that’s a no go. I feel like my only option would be to find one of them a new home…which of course would have to be Mer because Calleigh was here first. *sigh* Why can’t they just get along?